Today we combine the woo-woo of using intuition with the logic of science, to make better decisions in your business with our brilliant guest Mare Forfa.
True confession: my default setting is day-dream 🙂
Maybe you can relate?
Even though I have a very strategic and logical mind with an almost insatiable curiosity to understand how things work…by brain very quickly flicks over into day-dreaming, imagining and, as many friends have noted in the past, vagueness!
Yet here’s what I know to be true.
Most of my greatest moments of clarity come during those day-dreaming moments.
The challenge of course, is having a system to “turn on” the day dream mode and access that intuitive state when you need it.
That’s what we cover today.
In this episode we discuss:
- The science behind intuition
- What are the conscious, subconscious and unconscious minds
- How do these relate to insights, intuition & instinct
- The role that senses play with the minds & the insights/intuition/instinct
- How the body relays the information to us in an “ah-ha moment”, “hell yeah!” or “no way”
- How to use all of the above information to make decisions in your life and business that align with the core of who you are.
- How to decipher if you’re making decisions from fear or if it’s truly your intuition speaking
Plus a special podcast bonus for you today. A bonus worksheet for you to download with the step-by-step process to tap into your intuition predictably to make better decisions.
You can watch the video, listen to the audio, download from the podcast directory, or read the transcript below. Never miss an episode. Click here for all the ways you can subscribe.
A Special Message From Janet
Thank you so much for being here. I know there are a lot of podcasts you could choose to listen to and you chose to join me on Romance Your Tribe Radio.
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Read The Transcript Here
Janet Beckers: Hello and welcome. Janet Beckers here from Romance Your Tribe radio and I’m really excited to introduce you to a beautiful friend of mine, Mare Forfa, how are you gorgeous?
Mare Forfa: Hi, how are you going? I’m so excited to be here today.
Janet Beckers: I am too. Now I’ll just tell you why I’ve actually invited Mare today before we get stuck into everything. Now Mare and I, we met it was quite a few years ago, wasn’t it? At a three day event on from Kate [inaudible], another mutual friend on, probably on PR wasn’t it? On publicity? Yeah. And, you know, when you just meet people and there’s something about their energy that you just go, “I know we’re going to be friends, you know, that- Mare had that beautiful energy about us. So, at that time though you were with your business, that you’re in with your husband, which is a Doctor’s Collective, a few around doctors, isn’t it?
Mare Forfa: Yeah, we have a couple of businesses. That one was actually PassGAMSAT, but we also run the Doctor’s Collective. So, yes, we- and we’re still running both but that where our focus was back then.
Janet Beckers: Yeah, very much so. And that’s the thing with that one there is that you are a huge part of that business, but it wasn’t necessarily your passion, your baby. And so since then we’ve kind of, you know, kept eyes on each other but we haven’t really connected a lot. And so it was so lovely just last week to get this call from you saying let’s just catch up about what you’re doing. And I was so excited to see your passion, you know, you now focusing on, you know, we’ve got that business going super duper well. Now, this is going to be my passion, my strengths. And I just love seeing that, you know, when you’ve got somebody that you can- now I go, “now, I get it. Now, I get why out energy really connected.” So, that’s why I have invited Maria along today. So, Marie, what we’re going to be talking about today is around intuition. So if you can kind of give us a really sort of simple outcome of what we will be talking about today. And then I just want to, before we get stuck into it, I just want to backtrack a little bit so people get to know why you’re talking about this. So first of all, what’s going to be the big things that we’re going to be doing today?
Mare Forfa: The big thing is we’re really going to focus on what is intuition and how does it work, not from a, “oh, I just kind of feel like I have a gut feeling.” But what is the process behind it? Because once you understand it, you can understand where your decisions are coming from. And is it fear, is it a gut feeling, and what is it that your body’s telling you and how do you take the next steps?
Janet Beckers: Yeah, I really, I love this topic because this is a thing that I find quite often with clients who, especially clients who are really in tune with their spirituality, who really trust their intuition is sometimes they will say, you know, I’m getting a message that I shouldn’t do this. And it’s really nice for us to be able to dive into this in a logical way as well as we would weigh.
Mare Forfa: Okay.
Janet Beckers: Because sometimes it’s fear and you can be getting them mixed up. You’ve really can be getting them mixed up. So I’m really excited to be approaching this logically and scientifically as well as like just totally embracing the whole, we would, that’s kind of summing up my whole, that’s my happy place, the cross between science. And so before we dive into that, so everybody that’s here really just get ready to take some notes because I’m expecting today that there’s going to be some, some really big “Aha’s” and possibly a little bit of challenging for you. So be open to that, okay? Now before we do, just let me- just tell, you know, introduce yourself, Mare, but in terms of like, why this, why now and really, who the hell are you to be teaching this anyway?
Mare Forfa: Who the hell does anyone think of teaching it, right? I have a little bit of an interesting story because, you’re very right in your introduction saying that, you know, I’ve been working for many years as an entrepreneur. My husband and I work together very closely and we’ve built multiple successful businesses. Probably the most noteworthy is PassGAMSAT, hoping premed students become doctors and then the Doctor’s Collective helping doctors really become business people. And when our first kind of business really took off, PassGAMSAT, I got to a point where everything was going so well and had a bit of like a, what could be then there’s like $1 million meltdown, you know, like when your business goes so well, so quickly and almost unexpectedly, although, you know, obviously it takes a lot of work because now everything’s going to go, now I’ve reached my dream, now I don’t have a dream now what the tyranny of the achieved gold, right?
And so my husband would be like traveling six months of […], Had this incredible business. We were literally changing lives. Well, we’re making doctors or- we don’t make them, but we help them become the doctors that were destined to be. And we were just ticking all these boxes and there was still something missing. There’s still this feeling of there’s something missing in my life. And that’s when I really connected to the spiritual work and the spiritual side because it was like I’ve always known that I was a medium. I’ve always known energetically, but it just wasn’t really accepted and not something, you know, that was necessarily embraced in my community or the people that I was in. And I was very- so, like, focused on the goals and hitting the business stuff. And yeah, it was about 2014 when I really started learning, when I started learning about intuition, about energy, about the universe, about all of these “woowoo’s” things. So it was very much like what you were saying, the mixed between having like a very practical pragmatic business orientated mind and then going, oh, there’s all these other things that have been using and they actually go together really well. And I need- I needed the backup of almost science and research to be able to allow me to get into that, and it’s kind of where I am now and that’s what I- I help people to understand.
Janet Beckers: Yeah. The thing, there’s a couple of things that really, really stood out to me in what you were saying there. First of all, that whole thing of a lot of times people will see that you’re either incredibly goal driven, focused action, or you’re the other end of the spectrum where you’re kind of, your feet aren’t on the ground. You can be, you know, hitting the clouds type thing. Totally “woowoo” very dreamy and action is all most like not something that you associate with people in that way. So the thing that I love that you’ve said here is- and we’ll dive in a little bit deeper when you say that, you know, I’ve always been a medium so we will dive into that a little bit because I know a lot of people are going to think what is that. But before we do is I love what you’ve just done there, that you’ve actually been able to debunk that stereotype to start with. That you’ve can- that you can only be one or the other.
You’re actually showing, well actually you can be both. It’s just that the other thing that I really picked up there was, and people who are, who are listening here or, or watching us, if you’re here watching the video is you might be finding yourself having that same pool of, you know, here is the practical entrepreneurial, be successful, be goal-driven, be action numbers, all of that sort of stuff. But you may be feeling this pull towards the more spiritual side that you may be rejecting. And the big thing that you were talking about is- yeah, and I know for me that was for a long time as well is- but that really can be very, very difficult if you are surrounded by a community that does not even acknowledge that the spiritual side maybe valid.
And this may be me stereotyping, but I have got a background working in health is the doctors and- you know the doctors community is very, very much around, you know, you have to be able to prove it. Where is the evidence? Show me the studies. Where is the science? And if you can’t prove it, show me the science. Well, I’m sorry, we’re not really going to support you on that. So a lot of people may be, you may be finding yourself in an environment that makes it so you really, really have to have a lot of bravery to stand up and say, you know what, I’m kind of in both camps here. So if people are listening and you can relate to that, I would love it if you would give us some feedback. So I the leave some comments where ever you are here for that and also come and hunt down Mare later on.
You know, we’ll show you how to do that so that you can go get your sister. So I’d like to acknowledge that courage actually that in the face, you know, the norm of your successful group and the people who you work with that you are willing to put your hand up and say, “Hey, I’m doing things a bit differently.” Yeah, it does, it takes guts. It really does take guts. Now let’s- if we can just dive in just a little bit. When you said that you’ve always been a medium, but you had to then go and do the research so that you could communicate that and also validate it for yourself as well. Can you just describe what do you mean by medium and then we’ll look, then we’ll be going to start diving into the science so you can share what you found for people.
Mare Forfa: Cool. Well, a medium to me in the most literal term is a communicator. And for me being a medium means that I’m able to communicate things. Now, be that in an interview with you, be that in front of, I’ve spoken in front of 2000 people before. I’ve spoken to a small intimate group of five. And I also am able to communicate with energy. And so basically from a physical perspective, we’re all made of energy. You’re made of energy. The table’s made of energy. Like clowns are made of energy. What is energy like? Literally everything is energy. And when I say I’ve always been a medium, I say that in so many […], I’ve always been a communicator. I was- you know, at uni and I was loving like there was an assessment that was about talking and giving a presentation. I was like, yes. And everyone else was like, oh, we hate that.
Or I love writing blog articles and writing whatever it is writing. I love singing. I love not saying I’m a good singer, I just love doing it. Yeah. And I also love having the ability to feel, and that’s what communicating really, you’re able to show your point of view, show your feelings. Give across a message to somebody and I feel like I’ve always had the ability to feel energy, and you know that and be able to maybe interpret it in a way that some people can’t. Particularly, I know that lots of people work on the chakra systems or energy systems. That for me has been just something I just have always been able to do and I didn’t realize it was something that some people needed to learn a little bit more or learn how to really focus in and do it. Does that make sense? Am I explaining [inaudible]
Janet Beckers: That is a really, really different description than I have ever heard of what does it mean to be a medium. Because I was expecting you to be able to say, well, I, you know, I can tap in and I can hear the voices or I have a feeling or I have an emotion that goes and I’m getting messages from people who’ve passed to people who were here. That’s always been my interpretation of what a medium is. But Yours is [inaudible]
Mare Forfa: I can do that too. To me, the difference between what you’re saying and what I’m saying is that to most people, a medium is only somebody that can speak to the dead. And to me, someone that’s passed over is it’s just a different energetic form. So it’s just someone who’s energetically in a different space and we can’t see them. However, what I believe in the way that I, and I feel like I really need to take ownership of that word because being a medium is so much more than that. Being a medium is not just being able … get Uncle Fred over there. But if your truth, being able to communicate a message to somebody, because it doesn’t matter if I can say another energetic form or whatever it is, if you cannot relay that to the other person in a way that they can hear the message, then what’s the point?
Janet Beckers: Yeah.
Mare Forfa: The pragmatic side of me, you’ve got to be able to communicate that. And I think that everybody can do this. This, I don’t think the special power that I have that you know, is magically bestowed upon me. I feel like this is something, and this is part of the work that I’m doing, that everybody can tap into being a better communicator, can be able to understand, for example, intuition, how that works and how they can make better decisions from that place. That to me is what a medium is, not just a psychic medium, but […] Person.
Janet Beckers: Oh, that is a really interesting way of looking at it. And, and for people who are listening here, did some of those things that Mare described then, were you thinking “yeah, yeah. That was me. That was me. That’s me.” When you were describing even down to the singing. I’m thinking, yeah, I’ve got, I’ve had singing lessons. I’m pretty crap, but I don’t care. I just enjoy, I just enjoy singing, you know? But from that whole thing of the communicating to being able to sometimes feel the energy of the other people, but then be able to put that communicating is a really different way of putting that there. And I like how you just say in a very [inaudible] way. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I get the communication from people who passed over. That’s, yeah, that’s, I just do that. Like how you just kind of […] As if, you know, it’s just another sense of energy and other communicating that it’s just all on the same space. Yeah.
Mare Forfa: It really is though. It is no more special than what someone in the physical plane needs to say to you. Right. In terms of, I know that a lot of people miss loved ones and, and I do have a look empathy for that, but I think that everybody has this ability. And you know, it’s how far down the rabbit hole do you really want to go?
Janet Beckers: Yeah. It’s really interesting. Look, I could talk about this particular part of it for ages, but we wide because this will become all anecdotal where I’ll start- I know when we talked for way longer than we intended to when we were first connecting, because, you know, I was some sharing some stories of some kind of freaky experiences that I had had that totally made me go, whoa. Like, how did that happen? That, I just love that you’ve just owned it and embraced it. It’s very, you know, it’s incredibly, normalizing which are really like, really like. So before we just now tip over into we’re going to share some of the signs, so that people can understand how does this work? I’m just really curious about- cause this is, this is a new business for you, isn’t it? It’s a new venture. So who is it that you are with your new, you know, you’ve talked about communication. So who is it that you’re really loving to work with when it comes to communicating, helping them to communicate.
Mare Forfa: I love working with women who are entrepreneurs mostly because I can connect with them very well. And I have, we have, we share experiences and I love working with women who have felt like, they have felt like there’s something missing and they know that there’s something missing but they don’t know how to find it. And they don’t know how to really tap into what it is that’s missing and, and really where to start with it. I often find that that means that maybe they’ve read a book, like maybe you’ve read Renee Brown’s dare to lead for example, and you’ve gone, I’ve read this book, get it, I understand it. How the hell do I implement this in my life? Or it’s a spiritual, maybe you’ve read Louise Hay or you’ve read something and it’s just, you’ve just gone, okay, there’s, there’s more to this. What do I do? And that’s who I love working with because they’re very open to the pragmatic side. And they’re also very open to the kind of, let’s call it the energetic side, the spiritual side.
Janet Beckers: Cool. That’s excellent. All right, so now let’s dive into our teaching part here. So everybody get your pens out. So where we going to be looking at intuition and how to be able to know if…
How do you use your intuition and how to be able to tell if it actually is intuition or if we’re looking at fear here. So I’m gonna kind of hand over the structure of how we were going to be talking about this over to you, Marie, and I’ll just interject.
Mare Forfa: Perfect. Perfect. Well, with intuition, I feel like we sometimes need to take a couple of steps back and start from the beginning. And it’s not a thousand steps back, but just a couple of steps back. And I want to start with a very normal thing for entrepreneurs. I’m sure you’ve seen like lots of images of a iceberg underwater. And at the top of the water is just that little bit of iceberg and all the actual main chunky bits are underneath, right? And I want you to hold that image in your mind when I’m going through all of these, because that image is a basic metaphor for the way that our brain and intuition really works. The top of kind of the iceberg, we will call our conscious mind. And that’s about 10 essential. So, and, you know, these figures are rough because we want to make, we make it easy, 10% basically.
But about 10% of our mind is really our conscious mind and that’s where all that thinking happens in everybody’s very well aware. We’re using our conscious mind right now to talk to each other. Just underneath the surface is the main chunk of the aspect and that is the subconscious mind and that takes about 60% of the spice in the mind, if you can say it that way. You know, 60% about […] And what we’re thinking and our beliefs and all of that stuff comes from the subconscious mind. Now, right at the bottom, so if we have the iceberg and then the big chunk of it, and then at the bottom, the last 30% is actually unconscious mind. And this is like the processing. Now most people just talk about the conscious and the subconscious, but the unconscious is really important as well because this is where we’re actually, we live from our unconscious place.
Like when I think about a heart beating, a hear just beats. Now, if we just [inaudible] this metaphor out and maybe we can start at the bottom. Now we’re talking about the unconscious mind. Its job is to keep you alive. Heart beating, blood pumping through me, the unconscious mind. It’s all about keeping us alive. And the easiest way to really think about that, is instinct, it’s the instinctual things that we do and it’s the reactions. So for example, if someone throws something at my face, I mean instinctually just giving ‘aah’, in front of the face and protect my face. That is not something that I think about, there’s not even really unconscious that is, sorry subconscious. It’s really unconscious. It just “I don’t mean to” but my head goes there. This subconscious, so just one layer of that middle of the iceberg.
That’s where he intuition lives that is the bit that is communicating to us and the conscious bit, and we’re going to come back to that intuition bit, but the conscious bit is really where the insight happens. So this is where we start to form ideas and we can start to communicate them and the insight, the 10% bit is really important because this is what is what we’re focusing on right now. Now the subconscious and the intuition, it’s really important to know that this is where the bulk of our beliefs and our behaviors come from. And we use our conscious mind to kind of dove in and, kind of goes both way. Conscious and subconscious. They communicate with each other at a certain point in time depending on what the circumstances, mostly through our senses. So you’ve got eyes, nose, mouth, ears, touch, right? Five senses. And what’s happening right now?
You might be driving, say listening to this podcast and you’re driving, I often drive with podcasts on and you’re feeling the steering wheel. You might’ve taken a sip of coke or a sip of water. You’re focusing your eyes on the road, you’re paying attention to that. You’re listening to me and Janet, all of these things are happening, but really stickly you can’t take in all of that information at once and be able to process it in the conscious mind. So all of the information is coming because you’re driving like the ad on the side of the road. You may not be actually consciously looking at it, but it’s going straight into your subconscious mind. And your subconscious mind then uses the processing to send up to the conscious mind what’s important. So if the person in front of you slams on the break, then your subconscious mind is like, “Go, conscious mind”, and you’re like [inaudible], you’d slam on the brake, right? So the processing doesn’t always happen in the conscious mind, happens in the subconscious and it sends up the important bits.
All the data that you conscious mind needs to really focus on. That’s why when you slam on the brakes, you’re not paying attention to the ad on the side of the road, the big billboard. Have no idea with, because it’s down in the subconscious and it’s not actually being brought up as the important thing to focus on. Now what happens is when there is, the intuition or the subconscious kind of talking to you, often it comes up in ways that the subconscious doesn’t talk in words. It doesn’t go, “Mare, you need to do blah, blah” usually comes up in a way of a feeling or a different way of being able communicate with you. So you tell me, Janet, when you feel like, your intuition is speaking to you, how is some of the things that you really feel like it’s communicating with you?
Janet Beckers: We’ve may- I always think about that term of trust your gut when you know it’s, I mean that’s been a term that’s been around for ages, but for me it is very, very much an actual real thing. So I will be quite often I will feel in my gut or in my solar plexus, something that is either like a tightness. So they can be that, especially if something’s wrong. If I’m feeling like there’s something that’s not quite right in a situation that doesn’t work, otherwise it will also tend to be, I will have- I’m a person that can flip between daydream mode and on point let’s go mode like really, really quickly. But I do think my default is daydream and so I will find quite often I’ll go into a daydream mode really quite quickly in a time when I shouldn’t be. So for me that’s kind of like, well, why have you gone into daydream? What’s happening in me? Just listen. So for me it’s in two places.
Mare Forfa: So what I’m hearing you say is that that’s really a feeling that you get. It’s a feeling in your gut, physical feeling, all the people describe it as butterflies, particularly when it’s fear. I can give you an example of when I met my husband, we had literally just met like a day or two […], I remember going up in a lift with him and I turned around and I felt it was like a lightning had struck. I was like, “what the”, and I didn’t actually understand energetically what that was. How that was like kind of intuition speaking to me and he actually at a different time had exactly the same feeling. Ah. Which I think is very interesting.
Janet Beckers: That’s a whole [inaudible] isn’t it? You know, it was my […]
Mare Forfa: Yeah. I didn’t understand at that time that that was really energetically was the intuition talking to me. And that was all the subconscious than like all of it was happening. But what is really important is that you need to understand that when the intuition is talking to you, the language that it speaks to you. So I often find that if people are writing notes, I’m actually writing down instances when you felt like you’ve had this information coming to you, what was the actual feeling for you specifically? Because that’s going to be different for everybody, but the feeling is really important. Now to go to the next step, we’ve got three layers. We have the conscious, the subconscious, the unconscious. The insight, the intuition, the instinct. The next way that this really applies is really from the brain being the conscious. So, the processing that happens in your brain is really inside and that is where those aha moments come from.
Mare Forfa: You go, “ah, I get it.” I know you’ve told me seven times that these and these can vary together, but now my brain is actually paste it together. The intuition area and when it’s a feeling of the yes and a positive for most people, that comes from the heart space. And that subconscious communication generally comes from that heart space. Now the interesting thing for most people is that the unconscious, the instinct generally comes from that gut place and you go, oh, they’ve got that either from the solar plexus or the gut when it’s like when it’s something bad, it’s from that and that’s generally where the no’s come from and the fear comes from. So when people say to me, I just got this gut feeling, I’m going almost immediately know that they are coming from that place of fear.
They’re coming from that instinct place and your instinct is there to keep you alive. It’s not there to help you grow. I’m going to repeat that. Your instinct is there to keep you alive, it is not there to help you grow. That is so important when looking at intuition to go, is this my instinct talking? Is this my gut talking? Is this the voice of fear is, it this the voice of no or is this my intuition? Is this by heart space? Is this the space of yes? Is this the voice of love? What is this? Is this the voice of growth? And where is it, not just physically, but what sort of communication is that with you? Is that all making sense?
Janet Beckers: Yeah. Now, I just want to clarify something here because this is sort of diving into, something that I see quite often with people who I’m working with and we all- and also in myself of course is, you know, wait, what’d you talked about there is if it’s coming from guts it’s in the unconscious, it’s in fear when people quite often we’ll go, you know, I’m getting the message. And these were quite often will be people who, you know, are feeling that they have, you know, that they have, like a medium type strength. That medium, not […] average, medium as in your definition. I know we have probably got, well I’m getting the message from my guides or my angels or whatever they call it, that this is a no. But if they’re actually, if I was to say to them, I want you to ask yourself, are you getting that message from the gut or are you getting that message from the heart? If they’re saying it’s coming from the gut isn’t very likely that it may not actually be any tuition. It may actually be a fear that they have got so…
Mare Forfa: I, what I would actually suggest is you actually change how you ask the question. So instead of saying, is it from the gut or is it from the heart and giving them almost like two options. What I would be looking at […] to the client or to the person that he’s speaking to. Even if it’s not a client, let’s actually not go to the gut, but let’s actually live in the space of the heart and let’s focus and open up that heart energy and that heart space. And a really simple way to do that is to go, okay, let’s imagine right in the center of your chest, a beautiful green ball of light and really opening that light up. Not so that you’re stretching it out, but so that it grows in energy and increasing that energy so much that it fills your whole body, it fills the whole room. Maybe it feels the whole suburb, depending on how much you really want to open that up and then start to make the decision from that place. And from that place, the decision can still be ‘no’. That you know that that is not their fear, but they’re actually opening up from their heart center.
Janet Beckers: Oh look, this makes so much sense to me and I’ll tell you why I’m, this is kind of like a really lovely missing piece in something that I challenge myself to do every single day and it’s actually so core to what I do with my clients that I get them to fill out a contract at the beginning of us working together, not with me but with themselves. And I call it the “scarecited” contract. And because what I find is that time of growth when you talked about this survival and then there’s growth, is and that the fear is not that survival but you know tapping into that intuition if it is a yes place is growth is I what I call “scarecited”, which is kind of all just a word I made up, but then when I googled it, other people obviously you’ve come up with the same I think is a lot of times that you will be coming, there will be something happening in your business when you’re going like this really scares the crap out of me mainly because I’m going to have to push myself seriously out of my comfort zone to do this.
Like I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve had to do that. But the conscious decision I made was actually sitting in the back row of a multi speaker event where everybody been getting up on stage, sharing their stories of, I used to live in a rolled up newspaper in the middle of the road and now everything’s good. And I realized that the big thing that was different was they had all stepped into fear and that was the thing. So I made a decision then that if I felt that fear that I was going to step into it and challenge myself and that really the, I was going to step into that feeling of scare cited, like find the excitement in it. And I’ve actually found- for me scarecited is I feel the fear but I’m going to trust myself here and I’m going to back myself and I’m going to step into the excited and I’ll say, you’ll know when your scarecited because you’re going to feel that mixture of the fear but anticipation and enjoy that goes with it.
So I actually get people at the very beginning saying, I want you to step, sign a contract with yourself here. And it actually tells me if they’ve signed it. I can see it in the back end of our software to say I promise to myself when I feel, when I feel the fear I’m going to step into scarecited. So what you’ve described here is an actual method to step, to discover it. Is this, you know, is this a fear that I’m just holding myself back in or is this challenging me and how to get into that scarecited zone. I just love it that, that strategy that you just gave, that exercise of stepping into the heart and then making the decision from there is so powerful. Like it’s, it sounds simple, powerful. And for some people they may go “woowoo” but I’ve seen this work not just with myself but with my clients. I’ve just never had somebody described it in such a logical way, so thank you. Thank you for that. And my challenge to everybody listening here is, you know, embrace the scarecited. That is a great exercise to do. So as you said, you can say no from that point, but you know, you’re doing it.
Mare Forfa: And it’s a choice, and this is where I think, you know, making decisions from this place of understanding. You know, what is my conscious mind just overtaking? What is my subconscious mind saying and what is my unconscious mind trying to overtake as well. That’s where you can start to make the decisions from a place of strength because I run multiple businesses, it’s bloody scary. It is. Like I have so many times been like, what the hell are we going to do in this situation? Like how is, like I cannot see a way right now and being able to go, do you know what? I can live in this place of fear or I can move forward in this place of what you’re describing scarecited and doing that from that place is, just make life easier and it makes it below in a way where you can see the joy, the abundance, the gratitude. Because if you live in this fear place, it’s not a fun place to be. Life […] keep moving. It’s just not fun. It’s just not exciting.
Janet Beckers: Yeah, and you know what, that is such a really great point for you to make that you can still, life doesn’t stop because you have given into the fear. Like, it doesn’t stop because you’re going, I’m scared. I’m not going to take that action because some actions are going to happen anyway. So I love that distinction of this is how you get into flow. Cause that’s a point that a lot of people are saying, you know, you know when you’re in flow, but how do you actually create it? So would that, would you to get into that state of flow, would that exercise that you gave, [inaudible]
Mare Forfa: I mean that’s one very simple, quick, easy way. You can do it in five seconds and it’s probably the easiest way to start. There are heaps of other ways that you can do that energetically. I’m also from a physical and a mental, like I really work with my clients by going, here’s the physical, here’s the mental, here’s the spiritual and it’s like a table and it’s got three legs. And if any one of them is shorter than the others, you’re always going to feel a little bit wobbly. So I think you can dive into all the “woowoo” stuff and just focus on the spiritual and that’s really ungrounded spirituality. But what I think is also very important is that we get the mental mindset stuff working and the physical tools, like if you’re building a business, for example with you, you’re building businesses with people helping them build their own, I should say. Then they need to have the things to do. They need to understand marketing and sales and you know, so many other things. Without that physical stuff, none of the spiritual stuff is going to bring you to have abundance in your business if you don’t know that. So all three are just as important as the other. And it’s only, I think once you really excel in one area that sometimes you can see that the table is really unbalanced.
Janet Beckers: Yeah, I loved it. And it’s just, this is actually one of the lovely things that has come from our discussion is I do quite a bit of mindset stuff as well as the really practical stuff with my members. But a lot of that sort of that extra level that you’ve been talking about, that understanding of I’m working within that, that spiritual side, that third leg that you’ve talked about has been, we’ve got little bits of it but nothing that is a concrete thing for people to follow. So that’s actually one of the things that Mare is going to be doing is for our members is actually creating an expanded training on this so that the members that are in our program can actually have that to go to, to help them to make those decisions. Because as you said, you know, business is scary. Like it’s, if you want to have any kind of personal development, accelerated program […], you are diving straight into every fear that you can ever have is going to come up through your time in business and it’s not as if it’s only going to be for the first year or so and then you’re sitting pretty, it’s, it’s going to happen. Which is why I love it.
Mare Forfa: I’m telling you it’s still, it’s still terrifying. Still scarecited. That’s what it is.
Janet Beckers: Yeah. Living on the edge, baby. So I’ve loved this, you know how you’ve really made it clear with your- I love that you’ve given that distinction of if it’s coming from the gut that that is, you know, that’s usually the unconscious and it’s the fear. So making those decisions from the heart, it’s, it’s just a really beautiful distinction. So thank you so much for sharing that. For me, that was an aha. I would love to hear from everybody that’s listening here. Is that an aha for you? Does that make sense? And what are you doing with it? That’s the most important thing. So let’s just move on now to something that people can do this week. So what would be a challenge that people can do this week to start to explore and feel more confident stepping in, to trusting their intuition and knowing it’s intuition, not fear.
Mare Forfa: Yeah. I think the first step is always going to me identifying how your intuition is currently communicating with you. Is that, that gut feel, is it like with me and my husband […] that lightening bolt, is for me I get- my intuition speaks true feelings. I don’t see images, I don’t hear things and I can’t physically speak to the dead, but I can get feelings once I started to work on what those feelings were and what they meant and just starting to decipher the language that my kind of subconscious than my intuition or my heart that’s speaking with, then that allowed me to communicate better.
Janet Beckers: Yeah, that’s, that’s a really good point to start. Cause the thing that I can see here that requires mastery, and that’s why I guess people would work with somebody like you is there, you’ve got the interpretation that you’ve got at that very top level. You know, you’re getting all these messages that are coming from your subconscious. You’ve got to learn to communicate it so you can do something with that even if it was communicating it to yourself. So that’s, that then becomes the mastery of being able to
Mare Forfa: Yeah.
Janet Beckers: do that. Well, I’m imagining, so that’s a really first really good step is be start learning the language of what your subconscious is saying to you. How does it, how does it communicate to you is, that’s really powerful. So thank you so much, Mare. Is there anything that I’ve forgotten to ask that we should be finishing with before we help people how they can find out more.
Mare Forfa: Well look, we could talk for hours, you and I. We really, we have no problems talking, but I think that really the focus on knowing kind of the three pillars or the three legs of the table and having that ability to go, okay, where am I really physically within my business with my life really strong in the physical bit. Where am I strong in the mental bit? Where am I strong with the spiritual side? And if there is anything missing there, kind of understanding where the tables a little bit wobbly I think is also the next step to going. That’s my growth area. What took you to where you are, right now is not going to take you to the next level. So if you’re looking at what’s my next level, where’s my growth area? Can I have a fantastic business? But, and I know my mindset, right. Or I’m really spiritual that I have great mindset but my business sucks. Or you know, it could be in any area identifying that is, it’s really key to growth.
Janet Beckers: Yeah. I love it. That is a great way to finish. And so if, if people would like to find out more, connect with you, Mare, how can they do that?
Mare Forfa: Awesome. You can jump to my website which is mareforfa.com. Mare is spelt Mare, which is my traditional Macedonian name. Or they can find me on the socials, on Instagram, Facebook. Drop me a line, I’d love to hear feedback from people and fantastic stories of them using intuition, I love hearing that.
Janet Beckers: Yes. And you know what that is, you know, that is one of the best things that if you’re listening to this interview today, I mean, I do these podcasts because I just love communicating. I love the stories. I love just learning from people like Mare is, you know, but one of the best things is to be able to come and give some feedback, you know, and so, you know, just go and share stories, go and share stories with Marie, is such a wonderful way to give her feedback for the time that she spent today. So go and do that. Just go into their stories and come and share them with me too. I really, really love those. If you are watching this over on the blog post, if you look, if you come over to romanceyourtribe.com to the podcast area, you’ll see all the blog posts there.
If you’re listening to this on iTunes or something, you will see that there is a link there to go to that page anyway. Now on there, apart from seeing the video and seeing us hearing person is Mare’s going to send me through an infographic that we’re going to put on that page. So it kind of summarizes all this in one go for you. So that’s a super cool gift. Thank you for that cause go and get that. And, you know, save it, print it off, whatever. It’s going to help you to keep that in mind for you. So thank you so much for that, Mare. Thank you everybody for taking the time to be here. I can’t wait to hear your stories and yeah, and embrace the scarecited and just do it. So thank you so much for your time, Mare. Bye everybody!