Hands up if you’ve ever thought “I really should follow up that potential client but I don’t want to be seen as pushy and salesy”?

If that sounds like you then know you’re not alone. It’s rare to find anyone in business who hasn’t felt that same fear but the reality is, if you don’t make sales, then baby you don’t have a business! 

I’m not going to insult you by just saying “suck it up princess and just do it!”

Sure, in business you need to suck it up and put on your BGP (Big Girl Panties) all the time, to get results in the face of fear, but it is far easier when you have a process to follow, so you can simply follow the steps and not have to second guess yourself too much.

That’s my intention in today’s episode of Romance Your Tribe Radio.

I give you a process to follow, while answering this question sent in by podcast subscriber, Terry Bahat from Coreworks.” Re.Follow-up with a potential client; how long should I wait before I reconnect without them thinking I’m pushy / salesy/ a nag”.

Why The Usual Wisdom About Reframing Your Thoughts and Language Doesn’t Work

Let’s start by looking at the language you and Terry may be using.

If you see yourself as being salesy, annoying and pushy then you are assuming the person doesn’t want what you have to offer.

If your offer isn’t right for this person and isn’t going to help them, then why on Earth are you following them up?

If you have a solution to a problem they really need help with, then you are not selling, you are helping.

Now at this stage you may be rolling your eyes and thinking “yeah, yeah I’ve heard that before. It’s just a reframe so people feel better about selling”.

And you know what? You’re right!

Just reframing your language will not solve your problem.

It’s the equivalent of reading affirmations on a sticky label on your bathroom mirror and thinking “I’m saying it but I don’t believe it”. It’s not going to last.

That’s what I’m covering today.

How to know deep in your core that you ARE helping by following up and making the sale.

To just just say it, not just believe it. But to KNOW it.

So listen in or read the transcript below to learn:

  • WHY you feel like you are being pushy when you follow up a potential client
  • The Concept of The Transformational Journey and Transformational Outcomes in successful sales
  • When following up is WRONG – and how to know.
  • Why you should only follow up your most PROFITABLE avatar
  • Why following up people who are curious or just interested is a waste of yours and their time and what to do instead to turn them into a hot prospect.
  • What to say when people say they are highly motivated but haven’t committed.
  • External and Internal barriers that stop people buying and how to help a potential client identify them
  • The importance of an irresistible offer (Here’s a great episode and cheat sheet for you on Irresistible Offers)
  • The one sentence to use on a follow up email you can use over and over and is not pushy at all.

You can watch the video, listen to the audio, download from the podcast directory, or read the transcript below. Never miss an episode. Click here for all the ways you can subscribe.


Plus I’ve got a great free mini-course for you to guide you through answering all the questions I’ve raised in this episode, from identifying your Transformational Promise, most Profitable Avatar and your irresistible offer, customised to the exact stage you are in your business.

You can grab this for free over here.

A Special Message From Janet

Thank you so much for being here. I know there are a lot of podcasts you could choose to listen to  and you chose to join me on Romance Your Tribe Radio.


I’m honoured and  grateful for your support.

If you enjoyed this week’s episode, I’d love for you to take a quick minute to share your thoughts with us and leave an honest review and rating for the show over on iTunes!

Read The Transcript Here

Hello and welcome! Janet Beckers here. Do you have this question? Do you ever think, how many times should I be following somebody up that has shown some interest in whatever it is that you have to offer their lead and but they haven’t committed yet to actually signing up with you? When should you next contact them? How many times should you contact them? And when is too much, when does it become salesy, pushy, being nagging, being a real pain in the butt, just really, really being irritating. How do you know? Well, that’s the question that was sent through today from one of our listeners, Terry behalf from co-work. So, Hey Terry, thank you for the two great question. And if you have questions that you’d like to send through to, you can send those through to me and I’ll put a link on the podcast page where you can send through questions that you’ve got for your business.

So I’m going to approach this in the way that I do. Everything is in a systematic way. I’m going to break it down for you so you know exactly what to do and why you’re doing it in your own business because there’s no hard and fast rules about X number of days, X number of hours. So I’m going to break it down for you so you know that you’re making the right decisions for your business and I also have a gift for you that will really help you to get super duper clear and also help you to implement some of the things that I’m going to be talking about today. Now you can get that over at romance, your tribe.com forward slash success maps or success map. They both work. Okay. So when you go there, you’re going to be able to answer a couple of short questions and that will let me know exactly what stage you’re at at business.

And you will get a success map with the five most important steps that you need to take for the stage of business that you’re at, in what order. And it’s got the details on what to do, exercises and what to do. And for the next week you’ll get extra deep classes so that you can implement all totally free. So if I’m going through this today and you’re thinking, yeah, how do I do that? I’ve got you covered baby. So you can go to romance, your tribe.com forward slash success maps now, now that we’ve got all of that so you know where to go, let’s get in and answer this question for Terry. And I know this is a really common question that a lot of people listening will have. So thank you Terry for asking it really, really well. So the first thing that I want to do is I want to pick up on some languaging that that Terry had and that I know is not just Terry, that is anybody that is asking this question has this languaging and that language was becoming salesy and being annoying.

So the first thing that you want to think there is a bit of a reframe here and I’ll walk you through how to reframe that so that you know, and because if you’ve actually got a solution for somebody and they’re the right person, you’re not going to be a pain in the butt from following them up. You’re not salesy. It’s, and now we’re going to be approaching it not from you want the sale because this is your business. It’s going to be around helping them. Now, you may have heard this before and you might be young. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ve heard this whole idea of yeah, but it’s not about making sales. It’s about helping somebody else to get their outcomes. And a lot of times you may be rolling your eyes thinking, look, that’s just a reframe. Okay. That’s what people say, to try to make them sell themselves, feel better about selling.

And you know what often, that’s pretty true. They will do. They will, you’ll hear those phrases, but it’s not backed up on how to actually do that with integrity. How to actually be congruent when you’ve got that change in language. So let’s look at what backs up that change in language so that you’re not going to be thinking that any more. Okay. And if you are thinking that it’s going to be a red flag that you have not approached it in the three steps that I’m going to be sharing with you right now, because there is nothing worse than that feeling of going, Oh, I haven’t heard back from them, is it because they really don’t want what I’m doing? But they’re being polite. They’re not saying no. They just, you know, ghosting me. You know, that awful feeling that you’re getting, you’re expecting rejection, you’re expecting rejection when you do have contact with them and you’re expecting that there could be an outright rejection where they go, no, just back off.

That’s one of the biggest fears that we all have when it comes to making sales. And it’s an awful feeling. I don’t want you to have that. And if you do have that, you’ll know when we go against these three steps that actually you shouldn’t be chasing out if you’re getting that feeling because you’ve been able to market against these three steps. So what are these that help you to be able to know how often to follow them up and what to say when you do follow up. So we’re going through one, two, and three. So the very first one is you need to be able to ask yourself is, can I help this particular person to get the outcome that they want? So in order for you to be able to answer this question really, really clearly, there’s a couple of things that you need to know.

First of all, you need to know what kind of outcomes that you can get. Like what is the transformational journey that you can take people on from point a to point B? If you get the right person, can you say with absolute confidence that yeah, no brainer I can get, how can I help them to go from problem to the solution, the outcome that they’ve wanting, no brainer. I can help them to do that as long as I’ve got the right person. So the first thing is can you help them to get the result? If you’re arming and Aring on this a little bit, there’s usually two reasons for that. One is you’re not narrow enough. You haven’t really worked out very clearly. What is the transformation that you can create? What is the outcome that you can help people get with absolute confidence? So it could be because you can, well, I can help them with lots and lots of things.

You need to be super clear. It may mean that you can help people get say, four different transformations depending on where, what stage they’re at, but you need to be clear on what those are so that you know, yep, absolutely. I can help you. Now, the other part of that was if you have the right person. So the part that’s got to do with that is you need to then be absolutely super clear on who is the ideal person, like who is your most profitable avatar, not just somebody who can get results that you can get results with, but who can you get the best results with? Who is this actually tailored for? So that you know straight off when you see them, that’s them. That’s the person that I know that I can really, really help them get results. So they’re the two things that you need to ask yourself.

If you’re arming an Aring on that a it well, then know that you need to do some work on that. And it’s okay because the freebie that I’ve got for you will guide you through that process on what things that you need to be doing. Where do you need to get that information? Questions you need to ask yourself exercises to do to get clarity on those things. Like what is the transformational journey that you can take? The perfectly perfect client, the most profitable avatar. Those two things. When you get them, what can you help them achieve? If you’re not clear on this, well, it’s really difficult to make a sale because you can’t communicate to them why they would want to spend money with you. Like what’s going to be the outcome. Now the other thing before we move onto the second step is sometimes I will have people say, well, I can’t say they’re going to have this definite outcome because what I do with them may be you know, it might be that you’re doing some sort of work that is as a personal development, some sort of coaching work where you might be able to say, well, I can’t say to them they’re going to get this result because you know, it’s, that’s, I’m not working on that result.

I’m working on their strategies, their confidence, their communication, whatever it is. That’s okay. You can’t take responsibility for what they do with the outcome that you give them. But you can be very clear on the outcome, which is that they’re going to have a process that they can be using to help them make decisions or to have the confidence or a process to communicate. So that’s the other thing. If you’re going look, you can’t possibly prompt an outcome, your just chicken than out there a little bit. Okay? You’re not being clear enough on the where do your responsibilities finish and communicate that to them. So that’s number one, absolute clarity on who it is that you help get results with and absolute clarity on what that result looks like. What is point a for them and what is point B and that journey, that transformation.

Can you do that? If you can’t help them to get that, well why should they pay you anyway? Okay, let’s just be totally honest here. Go and work out how to get results for people and then they will pay you. So that is number one. And I know, I know Terri, she can get results for people, so that’s not going to be your problem. So it may very well be if you’ve got this point here and you’re thinking, Hmm, you know, I don’t know if they’re the right person because of B and C, well, they may not be the right avatar. They may not be the person you’re gonna get the best results with. So that is number one or what you’re doing for them. You may not be the best person that might need something else first before they will benefit from you. So help them put them to the right person that’s going to get them to the stage when now they can work with you.

So, but you won’t know that if you’re not clear on what your point is that you hope people with, right? So that is number one. Now once you’ve got that, well the next thing you’ve got is do they actually want help? Do they just because you can help them? Are they wanting to change? Are they actually after the transformation? Are they committed to doing it? Because if it’s actually not really on their radar, if they’re going, Oh yeah, that’s a good idea because they’ve had the conversation with you. But they haven’t gone, Oh, you know what, I really need that. That’s the difference. If they’re just going, Oh, that’s a great idea, well they’re probably not going to be motivated to buy anyway. So do they want it? Are they after the transformation that you have that you’re, that you can offer them? Now this is a really important one, and sometimes it’s not one that you want to hear.

So if they’re not really committed, if they’re not that really wanting the results, then you’ve got the next step. Okay, if they’re not really ready, if they’re not wanting it, well perhaps they need some kind of education. So that’s where you being able to give them some kind of content that is going to help them to understand the benefits of they of getting, of achieving the outcome. You know, that you can help them, you know that you’ve got the solution for them and you know from what you know from them that absolutely you can help them get the results. If they don’t, if they’re not motivated, well maybe they will be. If you have got some education for them, some content that may be where you’ve got some articles that you’ve written, you might have videos that you’ve made, webinars that you’ve done, whatever it is that you can provide as content that shows them that you know what they’re doing and can really communicate the benefits to them.

So if you are assessing the people that you’ve got, number one, if you’re following somebody up and you’re not really sure on what the outcomes are that you want from them, well that’s your first followup. What is it that you’re wanting to achieve? The next step is going to be, well, how important is it to you? Like a rating out of 10 like how do you know how important is for you to achieve this? If they’re going to be saying, Oh, I’m a bit of a five, a bit of a four, well then help them to decide. Give them that education that’s going to help you to follow up. That’s what you’re following up with. Okay, now the next step we’ve got. Absolutely. You’ve got somebody that says, well yeah, this is actually really important to me, but they still haven’t bought, why on earth haven’t they bought?

So how do you follow them up? It may be that, yeah, this is important to me, but at the moment it’s not their top priority. It may very well be that they’ve got something that’s coming up that’s going to stop them. It could be that they have a commitment, either financial your timewise to something else, but they will be ready. They will be able to make it a priority in a month or two months. It may be that, you know, I’ve had people where they’re going, absolutely, I really want to work with you. It is a top priority, but I booked in a holiday and it’s going to be for a month and so I’d be crazy to do something now that’s, you know, that’s, they’re really valid reasons. So that’s the next side of it. If you’re, if you know that this is really important to them, so you need to find out from them like when it’s going to be, what’s stopping you.

Basically, what is stopping you from taking action now? Is it important for you to get it done now or is it something that you’re really putting off until next year? But just explain it so that can be your follow up. First of all, finding out how important that is to them. And then, alright, when are we going to get it down? Because they’ve said it’s important. So ask them. Just ask them. That can be your follow up. You’ve said that this is really important. What I’d like to know is what’s your timeframe on this so I can help you to be able to play if they’re, you know, if they’ve got something definite, then we’ll, you know, okay, I’m going to follow you up. I’ll keep in contact. I’ve got some great free information for you and I will follow you. I will get in contact again on this date when you know that you’re ready.

If they’re going well, it’s really important. But yeah, I’m not really, I’m not sure when I’m going to start. While it’s something more, isn’t it? And it could be, that’s where it’s coming into the things that are stopping them. And very often it may not be you, it may not be that you’re not the right person, that your program’s not the right program. It may be self-doubt on their part that am I capable of doing it now? If you’ve been helping clients for a while, you’ll have an idea of what those self-doubts are. So you can challenge them on those. You can say, okay, I’m just going to follow you up. Because in my experience, when people know that this is super important to them, but they’re not ready to take action yet, it could be because of me. So let me know if it’s, if I’m not the right person for you, just let me know.

That’s okay. But if it’s not that, in my experience, it will usually fall into one of these things. Do any of those sound like that could be an issue for you? So just ask them, you know, what’s going through their mind. These are the follow ups that you can do. So there’s no use saying, are you ready to buy? Are you ready to buy? Are you ready to buy until you can be entering the conversation that’s happening in their head. So it may be they’re not the right customer for you or you’re really unclear on the outcome. So they needed education and you and I need to refine. It could be that it’s not really that important to them. Now that could be because really you could help them, but it’s not really important to them. It might be later on. But you know, it could be that they just need some education to help them make a decision so that I can see the benefits, they can visualize what is possible.

That’s where your follow up comes in there. The next part might be yet they’re all there, but it’s an internal thing stopping them. And that’s where it really helps if you have got some free resources to answer those questions for them, that answer those objections. And these could be case studies. These could be videos that you’ve done. They could be articles that you’ve done. This is how you can be following them up. Okay. Because once you’ve decided, once you’ve worked through and you’ve gone, okay, I can help this person, I’ve got the transformation, they’re clear on what that is. They understand the benefits, they know it’s important and they’ve actually said it’s important and they say that they don’t have anything at the moment that’s actually using their time or their other resources so that could be ready to go. I’ve helped them to really discover if there are internal blockages, some self doubts and how you can meet those, then it’s, I think you can just go, so what’s stopping him?

When? When will we start ask for the sale? Just ask for the sale and just understand that you know what you’re going to have a lot of people out there that you can help. Only a certain amount of them want to actually do anything about it. And of those only a certain amount are ready to do it. Now. It doesn’t mean it’s a no, it could be a no now and off those ones that are ready to start now. They may just need some reassurance that they can do it, that they can get the outcomes with your help. So don’t see it as all rejection. See it as your way of doing like a triage to work out who is ready for you to help. Now when it comes to you’ve worked out, okay, here’s the right person. There may be some things that are stopping them from saying yes.

Now that’s where having a good offer comes in. Having an offer that actually makes them go, wow, that is a total no brainer. That’s, I’d be crazy not to take it and providing some kind of reward for actually taking action now that you know whether, whether that is a limited bonus, whether it is it’s closing soon, whatever it is that you’re going to be doing, get them to make the decision now and so, but there’s only the use making that to people who are at that point where they’re ready to buy, but they’re having some kind of self-doubt. Then that’s what your offer does. It helps to alleviate any doubt they’re having you and alleviate any doubt they have in themselves. So if you need help with that, I’ve also got podcast episodes on doing good offer and I also have in the free training that I’ve got for you, which is at romanceyourtribe.com/successmaps.

I’ve also got there about making an offer, what do you need to have in your office? So all of that is that for you step by step in the exact order for whatever stage you’re at in business and you’re doing a very short quiz there. That will help me to be able to know which is the right success map for you. So you don’t waste your time doing things that are in the wrong order or you don’t need to do or you don’t need to do yet. And of course to get in like in a lot of detail to be able to get full training on all these things and all the templates and worksheets and all those sorts of things. You can join the success circle and you can go to those at romanceyourtribe.com/successmaps. And that’s the community where you can join just for a monthly fee and that’s got everything in there to take you step by step.

And that’s where you also get access to me and other people who are working through the program where you’re going to get live support and really get some traction there. So you’ve got two, two ways that I can help you with that. But the most important thing is to always think back to those three steps. Always ask yourself, and I’ll just go over those again. Number one. And the question here was, how often should I follow people up? So you’ll see, I haven’t said to you what’s going to be a number one. Now, you know, two days later you say this, three days later you say that, come on, you can actually make those decisions yourself, but you’re going to be doing that depending on what stage they’re at. So this is how you know, and so you know you’re communicating the right message at the right time.

Your way of following up is a triage number one, can you help them, are they the right person, are they clear on what outcome they want? And is an outcome that you can do? That’s your first steps. They’re the kind of follow up and questions that you’re giving people and sending them resources to help them understand the next one, once you’re super clear on the transformational journey and your most profitable avatar and is there a match is how motivated are they? Do they actually want to have and the outcome. So you just got to ask them like how important is this? Like give us a rating out of 10 so I know. And then if they’re saying that, then you want to follow up. Well is, are you right now? Like how does this work out for you now? Is it something that you won’t be ready for a while and why?

If the Why is a bit blurry, you’ll know that it’s an internal thing. There are the not sure about you. Or they’re not sure about themselves. And usually if you’ve got to this point, they’re not sure about themselves. So that’s where you will again be answering those questions and those internal objections. And this is where great content comes in. And then the final one is, okay, you’ve said all these things you said you’re ready. Here is an absolutely no brainer offer. Now one simple wording that I will give you that helps you and helps them is digest. Always assume if you haven’t heard from people that it’s a know that it’s a rejection. If you’ve seen my inbox and you know, like most people, I have a couple of different email accounts. One that’s for communicating everything and another one where there’s all those newsletters we subscribed to or whatever, you know, they full.

And so sometimes they can be really important things that I want to go back to, but I’m going, wow, that’s almost, that’s already on the second page now because so much stuff has come in. So just simply acknowledging people. So sending them an email saying, Hey, if you’re, I know what it’s like. If you’re anything like me, your inbox gets really full really quickly. So I’m just flooding this back to the top of your inbox so that you can find it really, really simple. You can do that a few times. Okay. Just putting this back to the top of your inbox so you can find it at, acknowledges them that they’re busy and it doesn’t make them feel embarrassed about, Oh, I really should have replied and I feel really guilty that I didn’t. You’ve given them a reason why they can reply back and go, Oh, thank you.

Okay, so that’s just a really simple wording that you can use. Okay. I hope that that helps you. Again, go over to romance, your tribe.com forward slash success maps, and that’s where you’ll be able to get free training and a step by step map of the top five things for your business at your stage. That’s going to move you ahead the fastest as you can. And a lot of the things I’ve done here today will give you the action steps. Okay? Go get them. And thank you so much, Terry for a really good question. Carries from core works. And if you go over onto the the podcast web page, you’ll be able to get a link to go and connect with Terry. If you would like to have your question answered. And if you would like me to be able to put a focus on your business, links to your business and share them with my subscribers, then please send through your questions. You can do that by either just emailing me and also on this podcast page I will have the link for where you can go and give me all the information to be able to submit your question. And hopefully I will be able to choose your question that will be able to help other people as well. Okay, bye. Go get them folks!

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